Saturday, November 30, 2013

Most thankful for...

Since it's the holidays and everyone always posts what they are most thankful for, it has made me really think about some things that I've noticed. I've seen people say they are thankful for their pets and family and spouses and children.. but there is one thing that really confuses me. 

Growing up in a Christian home, I have always been taught that after you get married and have kids, the most important things in life should first be your relationship with God, secondly your relationship with your husband or wife and the lastly, your relationship with your kids. Without a solid relationship with God, your relationship with your husband/wife will be rocky, and with a rocky marriage, your kids will pick up on it and that is not a good example for them to see. But what irritates me is that I continue to see women obsessed with their kids... It makes me wonder--what about your husband?? Before those kids came along you used to seem so in love with him, but when you have kids, all you do is post pictures about how so in love with your kids you are. I know, most people reading this are probably thinking, Wait, you don't have kids how would you even know what it's like? You're right, I don't have kids, but I couldn't imagine ever loving my child more than my husband, because without my husband, those kids wouldn't have been able to exist. Without my husband, my children wouldn't have a solid family, without my husband, I would be alone and have no support system. It just bugs me to see people list what they are thankful for and say "I'm thankful for my kids, family, friends and husband"... why can't you put your husband first? Maybe that is what is wrong if you are having fights in your home, or your husband seems distant. He is probably thinking why should I have to fight for attention when it should be given gladly. 

Blaze and I were talking about it in the car yesterday. I told him I just couldn't imagine ever putting our kids over us. Yes that might sound selfish but we live our lives not even putting each other first, we put God first in our every day lives and will in our marriage. Without God, we could not be whole beings. He brought us together and I will always thank him for that. We always say that when we have kids, we will love them unconditionally, but we will always put us, as husband and wife, first. Our jobs as parents, is to help them grow and guide them in the right directions. To teach them and help them grow into their own person so that they can someday move away from home and start their own lives just like we all did with our parents. After they leave, what do you have left? Your husband. Now think, if you focus all of your attention and love into your kids, who end up leaving after 18 years, how will it be to be alone again with your husband (if you are still married)? Probably not very good. I told him that growing up, I always felt that my dad put his relationship with my step mom over us kids. I'm not saying that he didn't care for us or anything--he gave us everything and loved us so much. I just always wondered why he did put more effort and attention on his marriage, and that it never made sense until I got older. He was just doing what he was supposed to. Putting God first, then his marriage and then us kids. 


I know everyone lives their life different, but just think about it when you think about what you are truly thankful for. Try and put your husband first for a change if you normally don't. 

Hope yall had a great thankgiving! Have a great weekend! 


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